Saturday, September 13, 2008

Sassy Saturday

Once upon a time a man decided that he should record every day of the year and whether he had sex with his wife or not. In the 365 days he conducted his research, he only had sex 12 days. He recorded the reasons why his wife wouldn't have sex with him, and these are the results:

1. The sheets are clean...3 times
2. It is too late...17 times
3. Too tired from shopping all day...49 times
4. It is too early... 20 times
5. It is too hot...15 times
6. Pretending to be asleep...15 times
7. The kids can't sleep - they need me...24 times
8. Headache...22 times
9. Sunburn...7 times
10. Your Mother will hear us - she's just in the guest room...9 times
11. Not in the mood...43 times
12. You will wake the baby...17 times
13. Watching a late TV show...6 times
14. Too sore...26 times
15. Wrong time of month...36 times
16. Have to get up early...19 times
17. I'm blogging!...20 times

And Here is this man's wife's version of the research:

1. Came home drunk and tried to "do" the cat... 15 times
2. Did not come home at all...36 times
3. Did not come...21 times
4. Came too soon...33 times
5. Went soft before you got it in...33 times
6. Toes cramped...10 times
7. Working too late...38 times
8. Have to get up early to play golf...29 times
9. Had a fight and someone kicked you in the balls...2 times
10. Caught Herman in your zipper...4 times
11. Caught a cold and your nose kept running...3 times
12. Burned your tongue on hot coffee...3 times
13. You had a splinter in your finger...2 times
14. Came in your PJ's while reading a dirty book...16 times
15. Watching football on TV...98 times
16. Hemorrhoids flared up...10 times

I found most of this on the net, thought it was funny, and that I would share.

Feel free to link below if you're running something nifty on your blog today!

Mama of Romance

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1 comment:

Saretta said...

Hi! Love your blog! Just linked to you, I think...??