My husband and I have talked on a few occassions about him doing a GUEST post about how a Dad of 3 busy little kids feels about his sometimes Mama of Romance
xoxo
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My husband and I have talked on a few occassions about him doing a GUEST post about how a Dad of 3 busy little kids feels about his sometimes
This guy is funny. He reminds me a little bit of a younger Nicholas Cage, or that other funny guy that snorts a lot. Anyhow, he's a little naughty, so without anything further ado....here's the comedian Mitch Fatel!
I just turned a quarter of a century, can you believe it? And although no other Birthday has ever had me really feeling differently about my life, this one seems to have created a huge impact.
After a night full of tears, barely no sleep, and having spend it alone for the first time in my entire marriage in a different bed, in a different room, crying. I got up, and I felt different.
My husband has been making work his first priority since mid summer, and after months of fighting, and what I thought had been the worst of it behind us, I went to bed the night before my 25th Birthday with my husband calling me a "bossy," "nagging" wife who should have dinner at least in the microwave ready for him when he gets home late, again, and strive to please not only his stomach, but his insatiable desire to have sex daily, all without having my 1 true need answered - his presence.
I suppose he simply cannot understand why after he works so hard to provide for his family, why I should have any complaints.
Everything for me came crashing down.
Looking in the mirror at who I had become, and what I had allowed my life to be, I was silently making grave, near catastrophic decisions.
Would I stay married to the man of my dreams for as long as we both shall live? Would I allow my husband to make me feel guilty for not being the bread winner of the family, and yet not being a door mat, and making demands for myself and my family? Would I continue to be the cause of his misery because his hopes have sourly been disappointed at the lack of sex in our marriage, in his opinion? Should I continue to feel alone, with no support, miserable, that I had been deceived in having a partner in marriage, in raising kids only to find out that I'm on my own?
Would I continue to life a lonely existence, without the support of a husband, and father that was promised to me?
I thought about my dreams too.
Of being a writer, an illustrator, an artist. I wasn't going to go another day in this life without working towards these goals, never again. I've always put what I want last.
Before I was married my mother said this to me: "Don't get married. Not now. It's not the right time. You're young, you have to finish school. You'll wind up barefoot and pregnant, and he'll want to be the boss - because he'll be the one supporting you. Get your life straightened out first, get finished with school, make something of yourself, and you be his equal. He grew up with old-fashioned parents, he won't ever be able to see you as an equal unless you put yourself first."
With these words haunting me as I look in the mirror, crying because I feel like my mom had been exactly right. With her no longer here to help console me, to listen to me, or to guide me, I feel terrible alone, and for once I feel silenced.
I think my husband knew it on the day of my Birthday, he saw it in my eyes that it was as though I had died a little - or given up.
I believe that all marriages have their reasons for discord. Ours was sex, and money. While we both have different needs, and expectations, I feel like we have come to a point whether we need to decide whether we go one unhappily, happily, or not at all.
But, I also believe that a person can only go on so long while being ignored.
For my Birthday he had agreed not to buy me anything upon my request, all that I asked for was a little of his time - specifically to help finish a room in our some what neglected house.
He was about to leave for work, and asked if he should go ahead and get the required materials on his way home for the job, and I said that I didn't care.
He could have just let it be, and went about his way. But he didn't, he came home with the supplies anyway, and finished the room completely.
Afterward, he turned to me, and held me, and it was as though I had my old husband back. He asked what was wrong, and for once he really listened.
I told him how I felt, that I didn't want to go another 5 years with him being miserable that he doesn't get enough sex, me being the cause of his misery. I didn't want to be miserable because my kids, and myself don't get to spend enough time with him. I wanted to choose happiness. I asked - what he wanted to choose. Again, I told him my one and only request - that he just be home a little earlier, for dinner, and to help put the kids to bed, every day. That's it.
He choose happiness, too, albeit it's imperfection.
We went out that evening, it had been the first time we'd gone out in a month or so. It was much needed.
I spent a lot of time talking to an older neighbor that had been there as well, and this is what she had to say about marriage:
"Marriage is never perfect. Couples always have their differences, their problems. It's when one person believes that the grass might be greener on the other side, that they aren't satisfied that they are sorely mistaken, because the grass on the other side has it's pitfalls too. It's important to play together, the family that plays together, stays together. Make time for just the two of you, and make your expectations clear."
I repeated all of this to him, and I think we both needed the night out together, and to hear these words. Marriage certainly has it's ups, and downs, and they all certainly make us stronger.
As I bent over to pick up some dirty clothes off of the floor, and head toward the laundry room with them, I catch my husband staring at me.
I don't often just not care what I look like, but every rare occasion I just don't have any gusto left to fiddle with my hair, or get all dressed up.
I should start a poll for everyone to vote. Does "junk in your trunk" mean the fat in your butt, or your private parts? You tell me, apparently I'm out of the loop, but thankful that my husband doesn't think that I have a huge butt - to my knowledge anyhow.
Like a kid in a candy store, my husband pranced...dare I say *pranced* across our kitchen floor when he arrived home from work just the other day bearing a small box. The box appeared to house some kind of electronic/man tool/boring thing.
I heeded no concern.
However, hubbie continued to look extraordinarily excited. I wonder at this point - should I be worried?
When he finally set the mysterious box on the counter, I picked it up to get a better look, and to see what all of his excitement was about.
Do you know what it was?
A strobe light.
My husband made a special trip to the hardware store, to buy a strobe light.
What are we hosting a kiddy dance for all the 2, 3, and 4 year-olds in the neighborhood that I don't know about (I don't recall being informed about this monumental event.)
Then, I realize - ahhh, it's almost Halloween!! That's why he got the light. That makes sense, he wants to set the Halloween mood for when the 1...maybe 2 trick-or-treaters come. Oh wait, we won't be home!
What is this silly forsaken thing for anyway, I wonder?
So I ask. Trying not to sound annoyed that he spent money on something frivolous, or concerned about his mental state.
Me: "Dear, why did you buy a strobe light?"
Hubbie: "Just cause."
Me: "Cause....why?" I say, smiling.
Hubbie: "It's Halloween, don't you know."
Me: "Oh I know, well that's great! So why did you buy it?"
Hubbie: "Okay, well when I was younger these babies cost like 100 bucks, and it was on sale, and I always wanted one."
Me: Trying not to laugh my buns off at how geekishly corny, cute he is.
I shake my head, and continue about my business.
Well, I tell you there was so recapitulating of the good Ol' days because of that strobe light, no Sir. No heart felt fond memories of the yesteryear's.
He did not buy it because he always wanted one. As I saw later from my view laying in bed, with my naked hovering husband jiggling, and wiggling his buns in the blinking light - he bought it because he always wanted to dance in the light of a strobe light naked, in front of a woman.
I feel so lucky - Hehum to be that woman. Now turn off the light so you don't fall down, and break something, and so I don't feel like the world is spinning.
This is the good stuff that memories together are made of. This is right up there with the liquorice butt.
Sincerely,
Mama of Romance
xoxo
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4 years, 5 months, and 17 days ago I became a Mom for the very first time. It was one of the happiest days of my life.
Now, he wants to play with his big brothers all of the time, and all they want to do is play all of the time, that has Mommy (me) feeling a little lonely without a baby to rock, and hold. I'm still so young, and just not sure if I'm comfortable with the thought that my little one year-old, going on 4 might be my last little bundle of joy.
But, I'm thinking ahead...5 years, 10 years from now, am I going to look back, and wish that I had of had just 1 more child, just maybe that it might have been a girl.
That isn't to say that my little guys aren't the love of my life, or that I love them any less, because I don't - they mean everything to me.
Everyone think pink for me, would ya!?
In Dubai, a popular tourist destination for Britains, a couple have been charged, and sentenced to 3 months in jail for having sex on a public beach according to Yahoo news.
Reportedly, one of them admitted to having sex on the beach, but then later changed their story. The couple had been drinking heavily apparently.
One of the first trips that my husband, and I made together was to an exotic place where we did make love on a beach. It was 5 o'clock in the morning, the sun was rising, and no one could be found.
So, the resort was close to vacant in the early mornings.
If you're going any where with your partner, it is well advised to look into some of their countries laws, and regulations before you have sex in public, do anything that might be deemed "indecent," or do anything at all - because you never know.

One time, my husband and I were laying in bed, and were talking about our family, whether we wanted to have more kids, or not, and the conversation led to vasectomies. Well, that word alone is enough for my husband to shrivel up into a little wet noodle.What's a "no-no" for you?
1. Romantic - this one is obvious (especially if you read my blog frequently!) Got to have the romance. Sweet words, kind thoughts, surprises, and of course being a good old fashioned gentleman.
3. Intelligent - He has to be able to carry a good conversation, have good values, morals, know how to do things, stand up for himself, and speak his mind.
8. Muscles - Especially in the arms, chest, and stomach. If you have them great, if you don't..hey at least it gives you motivation to work on them.)
Okay, so I'm a corny, sappy, poo when it comes to romantic movies.Sincerely,
Mama of Romance
xoxo
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This coming weekend is very exciting, and very emotional for me - my youngest, little, baby is turning 1.
I'll soon have 3 little guys running around, playing, growing up, and no little baby to hold in my arms any more.
I so do not qualify as a good 1955 housewife!!
Thank you very much Housekeeping Monthly for bringing to my attention that I should tighten my apron straps to the point of near suffocation, get out the good old duck tape while I'm at it, and smack a piece across my mouth. Because, otherwise I might not be able to follow any of these rules that were clearly written my a man (I hope.)
- Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
- Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you’ll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
- Be a little gay, and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
- Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house jut before your husband arrives.
- Gather up school books, toys, paper, etc and then run a dust cloth over the tables.
- Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a little too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
- Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children’s hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair, and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.
- Be happy to see him.
- Greet him with a warm smile and show your sincerity to your desire to please him.
- Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
- Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure ans his very real need to be at home and relax.
- Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order, and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
- Don’t greet him with complaints and problems.
- Don’t complain if he’s late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as a minor complaint to what he might have gone through that day.
- Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or hot drink ready for him.
Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
- Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house, and as such will always exercise his will fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
- A good wife always knows her place.
The part about no worries if he comes home late, or not at all.....his thoughts are more important than yours....not to ever question him - that so would not fly in our home.
My goodness, it is my luck I was born to be a wife in the 21st century! Otherwise I'm not sure I would have survived. I can picture it - I'd be a real wild women according to onlookers, shunned, someone who all the other men would keep their wives away from for fear I might turn them on their husbands.
Treat others the way that you want to be treated. Say "I Love You" often, very often. Work as a team. Speak your mind. Never call people names. Stand up for what you believe in. Love your family like no other. Treasure friends, and family. If you're going to do something, do it right. Be passionate about all that you do. Live your dreams.
Don't forget to go on over and check out Boo's blog, it's great.
Happy Weekend everyone!
Look out billion dollar pharmaceutical companies, look out Viagra share holders, here comes the Chinese herbal remedy called Horny Goat weed!
It is also referred to as Epimedium, Barrenwort, Bishop's Hat, Fairy Wings, or Yin Yang Huo.
Erectile dysfunction is a common condition worldwide, and while there are drugs that can help this condition by increasing blood flow to the genitals, Horny Goat weed is a promising natural remedy that may not be as intrusive for those who are aiming to take a more natural, lower risk approach.
Upon studying Horny Goat weed specifically, researchers began to modify a compound in the plant called icariin, finding that it blocked the erection-inhibiting enzyme as well as Viagra.
I wonder if this Horny Goat weed will work for women too? Hmmmm...