I'm Back!

After what has been a whirl-wind week of ups, and downs, being crazy busy, and completely calm, I'm back.

Thanks for being patient with me!

At the beginning of last week I was 100% certain that I was pregnant, and had been for a few weeks. I was having all of the symptoms, and 1 out of 4 tests read a slight positive (for anyone who does not know what I mean, it means that one of the lines in the + sign was fainter than the other one.)

Anyhow, I made the best decision in the world to keep myself occupied with life, and to finish all that I have been putting off, and also in not letting myself get my hopes up, because I am not pregnant ;( anymore.

It's okay though, I'm alright with it now. I was, I'm certain, but only a few weeks along, so it could have been worse.

This has never happened to me before, and was shocking at the time. I started spotting ever so lightly on the day of my period, and then nothing for 4 days. On the 4th day, I began spotting again, all day. I thought perhaps this was normal, because some women spot slightly the first month that they are pregnant. It certainly wasn't anything near my normal heavy, aweful period. Until all of a sudden, it was the worst I've ever had.

Not to gross anyone out, but I feel it good to share the experience, that I just knew I was pregnant, because it looked as though there was a little more than just my "period" - if you know what I mean. Too much information, I know, but thought it good to share anyway.

I was devastated the day this happened, heart broken really, but then I remembered all the women that I know who have gone through worse, and I looked around at my beautiful family, and I knew it was going to be alright. Everything happens for a reason.

So, I have spent the week, with cramps, and aweful feelings, but have come to make a great decision in my life. I am not going to continue trying to get pregnant right away any longer, I want to give myself a bit of a break, and I'm going to do one of the last things that I've been meaning to do but have kept on the back burner in my life. I'm going to lose weight! In fact, I've already lost 5 pounds, and I'm on a great new diet, and exercise program which has really been all about eating healthier, and eating the right amounts of certain types of foods. An overall bettter lifestyle change.

My goal is to lose all my baby weight from my previous 3 babes, by
March. I have 35lbs to go.

When I reach my goal, I plan to go on a holiday with my hubbie to Florida if, and when I succeed - and without the kids, then we're going to start trying again!!!

I'm so excited about it, and it feels right.

I feel like I should have known that what I was doing with trying ti have a baby right away, was just not the right time for our family - 9 months from now, is not a great time for our family to have a new baby, and a year from now seems a whole lot better timing for us. That way there will be no stressing, and no rush.

So I'm happy to report that I'm happy. I'm glad I took the break that I needed (some other things in my life just had to take priority for a change,) and that I'm back, whether you like it, or not, you're stuck with me talking about good ol' sex, and motherhood!!

Now that my period is FINALLY over, man it was horrible, tonight is going to be made into a romantic, fun, and passionate one for hubbie, and I.

After almost a week and a half without sex, I tell you even little ol' me is getting kinda hungry for some lovin'!

Well, talk at you all later, thanks again for being so supportive, you gals- and guys are all so amazing!



Sincerely,

Mama of Romance
xoxo

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I Blog for Sanity

I'm sure that many Moms, and Dads that blog can relate to "blogging for sanity." It truly seems to be a great venew to vent, rant, or to do whatever it is that you need to do to feel better - it's great therapy!

I'm sure many of you are also wondering what happened this morning....well no sign of any monthly visitors yet! So I'm super excited, but trying to control myself since I'm a firm believer in NOT getting your hopes up.

In the mean time, until I get a definite answer, I'm going to be taking a little blogging break, because I can't bare reflecting on any thoughts at the moment, as they are all centered on 1 thing: getting pregnant.

So until I know either YES or NO...I'm going to take a short break, and get all the things done that I've been putting last in my life. I have a mural for my son to finish, an office that is basically a mountain of paperwork, a car that smells like poop and curdled milk, 3 dogs to groom, a blanket to finish crocheting, a few books to finish illustrating, and a few more chapters to write on my many other books, and oh....I might make a few more quilts for my kids! LOL. Whatever it takes. YES - you would be AMAZED at what I can accomplish when I put my mind to it! I've inherited my mother's SUPER Woman gene to be super productive (hopefully reproductive too, haha.)

I plan to be back to my blog by the end of the week, and certainly by then I will have some firm answer as to whether or not I'm pregnant. Either way, I believe that everything happens for a reason, and I think that this is the perfect opportunity to tie up some loose ends in my life.

Who knows, maybe I'll come back a changed woman! I better Mom and Wife!? We'll see. Maybe I'll just find a way to get my sanity back! Talk soon everyone, and thanks for having me in your thoughts.

Sincerely,

Mama of Romance
xoxo

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If I'm Not Pregnant, I'm Out of My Mind

Alright Ladies, and Gentlemen, I think - I THINK that I am pregnant. After having 3 children to date, you'd think that I would just know.

And, after just recently taking 4 pregnancy tests, if I'm not pregnant, I swear that I'm losing my mind.

The symptoms:

Cravings of abnormally fatty foods that I seem willing to fight my 2 year-old for, inclination to clean like a mad woman and finish all the jobs that I've started, an enormous gut that appears to either be brought on by years of drinking beer (I hate beer) - OR a little wee baby growing inside of me, pants too tight, insatiable urge to pee, uncomfortable when trying to sleep, either really happy - OR really sad and can't stop crying, easily agitated, and the list goes on of all the little quirks that I've been feeling.

The results of my 4 pregnancy tests by the way have been a clear "-" which if you have ever taken one, you'll know means that I am NOT pregnant. Except....1 of them, it was the 3rd one that I took....there was an itty bitty, faint "" symbol behind the "-" that was almost completely indiscernible. Now I faithfully read the instructions, and they claim that even the faintest mark of a "+" means that you're pregnant, even if one of the lines is substantially fainter than the other one.

I tell you, all this anticipation, and uncertainty are driving me nuts. Really, I just want to know already.

I normally get my period tomorrow - the very first of the month, but no signs that it is coming as of yet. I realize that all these symptoms seem to be coming early - but everything seems to happen sooner as far as I'm concerned after the more kids you have.

So, here I am. Pregnant, maybe, maybe not, maybe. If only I had a field of daisies to pluck the pedals out of to buy some time. I'm twiddling my thumbs, oh my gosh you have no idea!!!

So here's the thing. In the past 2 days I have made an ENTIRE quilt to pass the time (actually to keep my mind completely off of the pregnancy subject), I've done 26 loads of laundry, changed 5 beds, vacuumed, done 7 loads of dishes, you get the point, baked 2 batches of chocolate cookies, and even made homemade pizza.

But, alas, I guess I'm brought to one conclusion - that only time will tell, and I most certainly do not want to get my hopes up.

Last thing that I wanted to say: that I feel a real urge to be honest right here, right now. I do not like mean people, at all. And, I want to say (because this is my blog, and I can say whatever I feel like) that if you are going to be mean when you comment, don't bother. You're wasting your breath, and I won't waste my time acknowledging you. I figure that mean people must be bored, or sad. I don't have the time in my life to be either, in fact I love all the people that I've met thus far blogging, and enjoy sharing my little bit of my life with the world, no matter how crazy it is sometimes. So get lost all of you mean people, and write a blog won't you! It's a great way to vent, in your own domain, literally.



Sincerely,

Mama of Romance
xoxo

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Pregnant Or Not

With all 3 of our other children, I can honestly say that we've never had trouble conceiving, with the labour, or the delivery. I know I am an extremely blessed woman when it comes to having children.

Now, we've been missing having sex every once, and a while for whatever reason. Mainly because I'm exhausted, and get to bed first. I'm assuming this has to do with the fact that I already have 3 small children who tire me out. We have put in the effort to have sex at different times of the day though, when I'm not so tired, but it doesn't seem to be cutting it - because there's nothing growing inside my tummy right now that I know of other than gas. That was too much information, I know, I'm sorry.

Anyhow, I know it's only been about 2 months since we've started trying, and that's nothing compared to what other women go through on their road to pregnancy, so I am not complaining.

What I was wondering however is, whether or not it's true that you can only get pregnant on about 2 days in a given month? If that's the case, I just hope that those 2 days don't land when I'm too tired, and sound asleep. I sure would like to pinpoint a time down.

Conceiving a child in my opinion shouldn't be like orchestrating a play, it shouldn't be like rocket science, however because of what lies down the road for us in about 9 months, we either have to get pregnant right now, or wait a while. I wonder if any other women, and their husbands have tried planning it down to a fine science as well? I certainly feel a little strange about doing so.

By the by, I wish that my desire to have a baby matched my desire to have sex! It's like my heart wants another little one so badly, but my brain is saying "ah well maybe not tonight." One would think that the desire to conceive would have me acting like a bunny on Viagra - but no.


Sincerely,

Mama of Romance
xoxo

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Dry Spells

**Weep, weep** you can hear from my husband as he walks out the door to work. Man, he has it bad. Can you believe it's been 3 full sexless days for him? He must think he's practically a virgin, or something. I am certain, that as married men, and women we all go through a "dry spell" every once, and a while when it comes to not having sex, or giving oral sex.

For us, it's been like 3 days, and already my husband is pouting, complaining, and exaggerating that it's been weeks, almost a month - and I thought I was the one who has succumbed to memory loss after having 3 little ones.

What I would like to know, and what I'm sure many women would like to know is what is the typical length of a "dry spell" in a marriage? Is it a week? A month? A year?


If everyone would share their experiences as married women, and men that have children that would be great. Perhaps myself, and many other women could give our husbands who are fathers, a reason to simmer down after only missing a night or 2! After all, sometimes there is more to life than sex - right?

Although, I know my husband would disagree.

The original version of this cartoon pic is shaking, and it's quite funny, I found it at www.cartoons4fun.com



Sincerely,

Mama of Romance
xoxo

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Fire in My Panties

So this is how it went....


I was awake for 3 full hours in the middle of the night, my 2 year-old decided that he no matter what did not want to stay in his bed.

The only reason I kept trying to put him back to bed was because I was afraid that he might fall down the stairs since he was half-asleep.

After a long, and stressful night, I groggily woke because I had to. My 2 other little ones were wide awake at sunrise, and needed me.

I didn't manage to get everyone out of their pajamas, or myself for that matter, but we all did get some breakfast just before my husband was about to leave for work.


He wasn't quite ready to leave just yet, and he asked me, "is there anything I can do for you Sweetheart? Anything at all?" He seemed to be reluctant to go.


"YES! - if you're going to hang around for a bit, you could please look after the kids for just a half hour so I can get some rest, my head feels like it's going to explode." I plea.


"Sure!" He says.


I'm just tingling with excitement, and love for my husband. What a great guy!

"How about we go back to bed, make love, and then I'll watch the kids?" He continues.

"Well that sounds perfect minus the making love part, someone has to watch the kids." I say.


"Oh, well, I have to get going anyway." He says.


"Well, what about my nap!?" I ask, feeling totally misled, and unimportant.


"I don't actually have time." He says.


No time!?? What happened to his generous offer just seconds earlier, oh wait, I know as soon as sex was taken out of the equation, my Dear husband ran out of time. Well thanks, thanks a lot.

I spent the day in my pajamas, with a frown on my face, feeling so tired that I felt like someone had just pumbled me, and squashed my head between 2 bricks. I thought, "wait until he needs a favor from me! Sure Honey, I'll give you a great big bj, but first.....oh wait, I forgot I don't have any time!"


Sincerely,

Mama of Romance
xoxo

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Wordless Wednesday

I normally do my "Naughty Wednesday" post on Wednesdays, but after seeing this picture I couldn't resist, it was so cute.

Sincerely,

Mama of Romance
xoxo

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